Hey all! I hope everyone has had an awesome first couple of weeks to the New Year! I have, but have also been under the weather. I just finished my round of steroids, and am happy to say that my eye sight has come back! It isn't 100% but so much better than it was. I also can't say I am sad to see those steroids go...they wreaked havoc on my body and were no fun to be on. I won't put them down too much though, they did do what they were suppose to.
However they did start the process of a 30lb weight gain. I did great in the beginning, pushing through the hunger and the overall shitty feelings I was having. But if anyone has ever been on a high dose of steroids, I am sure you understand me when I say the hunger pains those bad boys create are something else. I slept about 3 full night in a month and a half, and the rest I was up every hour if I could even fall asleep.
I would wake up so hungry that if I didn't eat I would throw up...it was awful. A snack wasn't good enough either...the amount of food I could pack away was intense. Something I hadn't done in so long. But I was always hungry.
I'm going to be honest, I also didn't eat the best food...in fact I ate all the wrong food. If I had eaten the right food, perhaps that 30lb gain would have only be 10lbs. But there is no use in focusing on the past right? Today is day 1 again.
What frustrates me is the number of day 1s I have. I know that it isn't a failure until you stop starting again, but I would like not to stop. Once I am back in my old (healthy) ways and am on a roll again I want to come up with a plan for myself for when I do go off plan. Something that acknowledges I need a break, or that my situation will make it very difficult to stick to plan. I'm tired of falling off. What I see for myself if the wagon stopping from time to time, to give myself a break, to adjust to my surroundings, to refocus.
It would essentially be a maintenance. Part of a person success in any journey, but specifically this one is to be prepared and to have a fall back plan for when things don't go as planned. I did not have one (once again) for this situation, but next time, I will.
Just as we prepare the fridge, and cupboards we need to prepare for those hiccups so that they we can recover from those situations easier as well.
So here, my friends, is to Day 1 again. Here is to taking charge, learning from your mistakes and being the best you can be in any situation. Keep killing it friends! The only thing we have to lose is what we have been trying to lose all along...the weight :D
Starting (again) weight 280lbs