Happy Sunday all! Hope everyone had a great weekend. I know we did! Downsize had our third annual Christmas party and it was great to see everyone together. It was also great seeing everyone stick to plans that they have set for themselves and helping others do the same.
Here is a snap from the night
We can't forget Pat! Pat has played for us every year for the past 3 years and I could listen to this man perform over and over again. Of course our fearless leader, Brie, was there to give him a hand for a few songs as well :D
He is 1/2 of the band Mason's Apron, and if you haven't had the chance to see them live, I highly recommend it. Pat is also the brains and artistic talent behind The Professor. Follow him on Facebook and show him some love!
So this weekend was busy to say the least but it was great time had by all.
This week was tough for me. Lots going on, work is winding down for the holiday season and that means busy bees everywhere while we get ready. On top of that I have a ton of doctors appointments and check ups going on to. It has been overwhelming.
I have also been really hard on myself. I am not use to having to rely on others and I find myself doing that a lot lately. I'm not driving much, so Jay has been my chauffeur and with all my appointments, the lovey people at work have been picking up my slack. I love them all very much for it, and everyone has been so kind and supportive. That doesn't mean I like having to do it.
I screwed up with my food this week, not a lot, but a little and I feel out of my element. I got thrown off my routine and am finding it really hard to get back into it. When I am thrown off my game, I find myself comparing myself more and more to those around me.
The ones who are succeeding, looks like they have their shit together, who seemed to be killing it in every aspect of their lives. And then, I shit talk myself. I tell myself I am not as strong as them, accomplished as them, hard working or capable as them. It sucks and it hurts and nothing good ever comes of it.
Please don't take this the wrong way. I am so proud of everyone accomplishments and I love seeing how well everyone is doing. The success and happiness of others drives me. But sometimes, when you think you are not being successful, you start thinking about your failures instead of anyones accomplishments. That is where one can get themselves in trouble.
The other day, I was reading through a FB group I am a part of, and there was a lady who had lost a ton of weight. Instead of thinking, holy shit good for her, my brain went to, I will never do that. What a weird thing to do, right? Why should her success mean my failure? What do they have to do with one another and why do I need to compare myself to her. What won't I be able to do? Loose weight? Wrong, I have done that. Wear smaller clothes again? Wrong, I have done that too. So where did I see myself failing?
I don't have an answer for this, I don't know where that negativity and self doubt came from. Because I look at each and everyone of you and think "Yes! They are doing the thing and they are doing it well and I am so proud of that". So why do we have a hard time seeing that in ourselves?
I left myself with those thoughts and moved on with my day. I was scrolling again later on and came across this video. It's a video from Danielle Brooks from OITNB and oh man ladies and gents, was she talking to me!
It isn't easy, it isn't easy to stop comparing yourself to those around you. But she is so right. Be a better you. Don't worry about what is going on around you. Support and encourage and grow the people that you surround yourself with. but don't compare yourself to them. Look at where you have come from, what you were doing the day, week, month or year before, and as long as you are making progress, getting fitter, healthier, stronger, you are crushing your competition.
Look in mirror and remember that the only one you have to beat, the only one you have to be better than, the only person you are doing this for is you. Don't be so hard on yourselves. You are leaps and bounds from the person you were not too long ago <3